


Heather

by sevenstevearmy



Series: Drabbles-ish [8]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Ambiguous/Open Ending, Angst, M/M, Pining, Self Confidence Issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-29
Updated: 2020-05-29
Packaged: 2021-03-03 00:28:59
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 879
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24435904
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sevenstevearmy/pseuds/sevenstevearmy
Summary: Set in highschool. Janus likes Virgil, Virgil likes Roman.
Relationships: Anxiety | Virgil Sanders & Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders & Deceit | Janus Sanders, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Deceit | Janus Sanders, Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders & Deceit | Janus Sanders
Series: Drabbles-ish [8]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1606048
Comments: 2
Kudos: 35





	Heather

_I still remember  
Third of December  
Me in your sweater  
You said it looked better  
On me, than it did you_

Janus could still feel the soft inside of Virgil’s prized sweater. He had been just kicked out of his home and staying with Remus so he didn’t yet have a coat. He was freezing by the time they got to school. Janus hadn’t asked for it, he didn’t think he would get it, but Virgil had just thrust it into his hands, the prized sweater he never took off for anyone, anyone except now him. He was already flushed so no one could see the blush that he felt spread across him. He nearly swooned at the very visible blush that crossed Virgil’s cheeks up to his ears as he received that sweater. It smelled like him when he put it on and he nearly died on the spot.

_Only if you knew  
How much I liked you_

He hadn’t really known when it was exactly that he fell in love with his best friend, but it was probably sometime between their first meeting in kindergarten and their first dance in 6th grade. A few weeks later Janus had a proper coat, but still took to wearing Virgil’s sweater once he got inside. Then he nearly did again for a different reason.

_But I watch your eyes, as she  
Walks by  
What a sight for  
Sore eyes  
Brighter than a  
Blue sky  
She's got you  
Mesmerized  
While I die_

Roman. Of all people, of course it was Roman. He was popular, involved in most of the clubs in some way or another, a gorgeous sculpture of a man, a total flirt, Remus’s brother, and the bane of Janus’s existence. It was no secret that Virgil was head over heels. He had come in one day soaked and shivering, so of course Virgil offered his sweatshirt, the one Janus was wearing.

“You don’t mind, right?”  
“Oh, no… Of course not.”

He took off the accursed garment and fled while Virgil took care of the clueless boy.

_Why would you ever kiss me?  
I'm not even half, as pretty  
You gave her your sweater  
It's just polyester, but you like her better  
Wish I were Heather_

Janus wished beyond anything that he was Roman at that moment if only to be the object of Virgil’s affection. Sure, having people stare at him for a good reason would be nice, and the privilege of being the star of the school could get him far, but none of it mattered if only Virgil would look at him with those eyes he was giving Roman.

_Watch as she stands with  
Her holding your hand  
Put your arm 'round her shoulder  
Now I'm getting colder_

It only took a month for Virgil to get through Roman’s dense skull, but honestly, who wouldn’t be captivated by Virgil?

_But how could I hate her?  
She's such an angel  
But then again, kinda  
Wish she were dead_

Roman was many things, but he was also kind. He always had the best of intentions. Really Janus had no reason to hate him. He was jealous, only jealous, and he knew it. But that didn’t stop the feeling he felt in his stomach, though if he thought about it, he might find it was directed towards himself. 

_as she  
Walks by  
What a sight for  
Sore eyes  
Brighter than a  
Blue sky  
She's got you  
Mesmerized  
While I die_

Prom came and went. Virgil went with Roman. Janus stayed home. The worst part of living with Remus, was living with Roman, though they didn’t often see each other in that large house. He could, however, hear all of the cheesy love songs Roman had started belting out, and see him as he rushed into Remus’s room to ask his brother about his make up for the dance and eventual dates. When asked why he wasn’t going, he complained about societal expectations and rules in order to bore the asker away, but in reality, he had only ever gone to dances with Virgil so they could support each other and quietly judge by the food table. Sometimes in preparation they had even danced in case they got asked. Without Virgil, he had no reason to go.

_Why would you ever kiss me?  
I'm not even half, as pretty  
You gave her your sweater  
It's just polyester, but you like her better  
I wish I were Heather_

They had grown farther and farther apart since that fateful day that Roman came in like a drowned rat, but he was still asked to be Virgil’s best man at the wedding. He accepted. Maybe he really was a masochist like Remus kept saying.

_Wish I were Heather  
Wish I were Heather_

Speak now or forever hold your peace. He didn’t move a muscle. He didn’t say a word. They kissed. 

_Why would you ever kiss me?  
I'm not even half as pretty  
You gave her your sweater  
It's just polyester, but you like her better  
Wish I were_

And that was what Janus saw as he took off the sweater without a complaint, because who in their right mind would ever think someone like Virgil could fall in love with someone like him.

**Author's Note:**

> I had to add that ending bc I made myself cry so at least this way it's kind of ambiguous as to whether it happens or if Janus is just extra insecure


End file.
